I so much enjoyed seeing how Caleb has matured recently. I witnessed it in the “fire” of his fight with Brody last night. I am still not quite sure what caused the fight, but they starting throwing fists. Caleb took some blows before I could break it up, and I saw how Caleb restrained himself . . . even though he said, “I want to hit him really bad.” I know at that age, it is SO hard to use self control, but he did. He had great manners and just seems to have grown in being a gentleman.

And sweet Brody . . . I know he feels emotion very deeply, and I could tell he was feeling a lot anger after his fight with his brother (which made him cry that he wanted to go home)!. Once he settled down, I told him I was sad that he wasn’t having fun at our slumber party. He announced that it wasn’t a real slumber party since we hadn’t had a pillow fight . . . so I whacked him with a pillow! After a few minutes of pillow fighting fun, Brody got in bed and turned into mister chatterbox (so funny). Anyway, after coming to tell me (a few times) that he was having trouble sleeping, he said, “God made my with lots of problems.” Before I could object, he caught himself and said, “But he also made me with lots of good things.” I loved that, because I knew those were words of truth that his momma spoke to him, and he is hearing them and believing them. In the morning, he also said, “Miss Angie, I’m sorry that I cried about going home.” That is so mature to apologize for something (and the next day too). And remorse shows sensitivity to wanting to do what is right. I know you are diligently directing him in what is right.

And Asher . . . what can I say? I ADORE him. He has the sweetest little heart and is so articulate for his age. I think your youngest will really bless you.

Anyway, just wanted to give you some words of encouragement, because you looked so discouraged when we met up. And since you asked for advice, here it is: keep up the good work, stand firm, and don’t grow weary … you WILL reap a harvest!

“Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain” (1 Corinthians 15:58).

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9).

I looked up Gregg Harris' 21 Family Rules, printed them up, and thought I'd pass them on to you down below.  Because we need one another.  We need a Tamara to walk with, an Angie to remind us of the  fruit that is being produced in our midst, and an Ashley to inspire fresh ideas for tomorrow.  

I can't be the only one who wanders into the valley some seasons, and so I share.  Here's hoping you are blessed.

The 21 Rules Of This House

by Gregg Harris

1. We obey God.

2. We love, honor and pray for one another.

3. We tell the truth.

4. We consider one another's interests ahead of our own.

5. We speak quietly and respectfully with one another.

6. We do not hurt one another with unkind words or deeds.

7. When someone needs correction, we correct him in love.

8. When someone is sorry, we forgive him.

9. When someone is sad, we comfort him.

10. When someone is happy, we rejoice with him.

11. When we have something nice to share, we share it.

12. When we have work to do, we do it without complaining.

13. We take good care of everything that God has given us.

14. We do not create unnecessary work for others.

15. When we open something, we close it.

16. When we take something out, we put it away.

17. When we turn something on, we turn it off.

18. When we make a mess, we clean it up.

19. When we do not know what to do, we ask.

20. When we go out, we act just as if we were in this house.

21. When we disobey or forget any of the 21 Rules of This House, we accept

the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Dear Caleb,  

Today at the beach you dug a cavernous hole, then asked your friends to bury you in it.  The only thing sticking out was your handsome face.  Looking back I think how well your sandy tomb must compare to being the oldest child in our house full of strong-willed boys.  

Absolutely fed up at times.  Up to your neck!  I get it.

And the toughest part of all must be when I zero in on you, and your behavior, and your heart.  I know it is is usually your brothers who are touching your things, messing up your room, pushing your buttons, and causing you to explode.  Once again, I get it.  But I want you to get this, sweet heart; our home is the perfect, God ordained, training ground for the rest of your life.  All the skills you need to deal with people as a Christian man will be cultivated right here in our home.  

I tell you often, "Caleb, there is only one man you are in control of.  That's you.  You can't control your brothers, your friends, or your bed time (most of the time), but you must be able to control your own man."  My boy, when you go to College you will likely have a roommate who interrupts you and plays music you don't like.  Will you be able to control your temper and be kind to him? You will be, if you can learn it here at home.  You may have a boss one day who talks down to you; will you be able to keep your head lifted high, knowing who you are in Christ?  You get to learn that here at home as well.  And one day when your lovely wife has a list of projects she needs your help on, and three little sons all vying for your attention and affection, you will need to know how to love them in the business of life.  And you will!  If you commit to learning to love here and now, in our home.

On the dry erase board that hangs by our breakfast table in the kitchen nook I have writen these words:

A new commandment I give you, Love One Another;

as I have loved you so you must Love One Another.  

By this all men will know that you are my disciples,

if you Love One Another. (John 13:34-35) 

I sang this verse in church during my growing up years, and it stuck in my brain and my heart.  It is my hope that as I sing it and live it in your presence, that you too will be inspired and encouraged to love others.  For Christ loved you first, my son.  That truth, that reality, that knowledge is where it must flow from.  But we practice it, the loving that is, here and now at home.

I said before, I know that it's hard.  I get it.  But I am praying for you and cheering you on as you practice love, practice this hard thing of loving despite the unlovely actions of your brothers, and even fumbles your father and I often make.  We are just sinners saved by grace, my son.  All of us.  So let's practice love together, that the world will know we are His disciples.

So proud of you.  I'm your greatest fan!

Mom

They (Paul and Barnabas) preached the gospel in that city (Antioch) and won a large number of disciples. Then they returned to Lystra, Iconium and Antioch, strengthening the disciples and encouraging them to remain true to the faith. (Acts 14:21-22)

There is a time and a purpose for everything under Heaven.  A time for quiet and rest, and a time for sleeplessness and chaos; there is a time for constant correction, and I know it seems it will never end, but the time will come to an end; today is the time for training, but there will come a tomorrow when we release them who have been trained... and watch, trust, and celebrate.  But this is not that season.

I am not there yet.  Even as I write, thinking my little shadow from this afternoon is fast asleep, I hear him crying out.  This post must be short.  There may be another season when my posts are longer and more consistent, but not today, not tonight.  Maybe when my shadow is grown — and the setting sun on this season elongates his frame and increases his stature. 

Goodnight.

There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,

a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,

a time to search and a time to give up,

a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,

a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,

a time for war and a time for peace.

(Ecclesiastes 3:1--8 )

How sweet are your words to my taste!

Yes, sweeter than honey to my mouth!

(Psalm 119:103)

My red leather-bound Bible could tell a thousand tales — not only stories of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, the prophets, or the days our Savior walked the earth.  My Bible is underlined, highlighted, with notes in the margins.  My favorite page is the one half eaten.  Literally.  Before My first born son could roll over he reached for my Bible, as I read on the floor beside him.  He tore part of the Psalms out and put the thin leaf paper into his slobbery little mouth.  I retrieved the torn piece, flattened it and dried it out, and now have it taped to the inside of my jewelry box.  Nothing I own is more beautiful to me (not diamonds, gold, or pearls) than the tangible reminder of my greatest hope — that one day all of my children grow up to believe, ingest, and speak to others the very Word of God.

Nine years ago, when my little Caleb was lapping up pages from my Bible, I knew very little about the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Even with all the underlining, highlighting, and writing I had done in the margins.  I knew about Jesus dying for my sins so that I might be forgiven.  And I belived.  But I didn't know what the gospel of Jesus, lived out in a daily way, interacting with others, was all about.  I thought that living the gospel was telling people about Jesus.  But I am slowly starting to see that the Gospel, lived out in our lives, is simply walking out the ministry of Jesus.  Extending grace and love and forgiveness, ever pointing to Him as we do.

Yesterday my Bible consuming boy spent the day playing his electric guitar at our church's performing arts camp.  Actually, he was supposed to be playing his guitar when in fact he was getting into trouble.  Lots of trouble.  I won't divulge the specifics, (9 1/2  is too old for cyber sharing) but I will say he came home remorseful and repentant, and wrote a dear apology to the child he had offended.  In the end my child went to sleep last night content in the knowledge that he was forgiven.   

His peaceful sleep reminded me of a verse I had memorized while he was in my womb:

There is therefore now no condemnation

to them which are in Christ Jesus,

who walk not after the flesh,

but after the Spirit.

Romans 8:1

Before he left for camp this morning I looked my boy straight in the eye and said, "You can stand tall when you walk into the church today — you are a forgiven boy, you don't need to be embarrassed or ashamed."  He nodded, smiled, and walked out the door with his head high.

* With all the scriptures I wanted to throw at him last night, all the correcting, berating, instructing him in godliness I had wanted to do... what he needed most of all was this picture of The Gospel.  Forgiveness.  So thankful that my husband is a calm and loving Dad.  That through his hugs and encouragement last night both Caleb and I learned more about the Gospel of Jesus Christ lived out in the lives of our children.  Ironically, today as I was going through some of the boys crafts I came upon a card Caleb made for Matt this Father's Day.  Inside the card our son wrote the words "Thank you for remaining calm with me when I've disobeyed."

My son and I responded:

Ladybug in green

Cold without freedom inside

- Ladybug set free

I think about, talk about, write about scones... a lot!  I serve them to family and friends every chance I get, sure that they will love my scones with the same measure of passion I do.  And they do.  

Just the other day I spent a few moments doing what any normal, scone loving foodie might find herself doing on a lovely summer afternoon... I wrote a haiku.  

Everyone tries

To surpass my perfect scone.

Try not - Just bring jam.

My scone recipe began nearly 12 years ago in the lobby of a doctor's office.  I was living in Plano, Texas, having just married my husband, and picked through the layers of hunting and fishing magazines to find an outdated Better Homes and Gardens.  It was then and there that I came across a little recipe entitled "Pat-a-Cakes"; scones so simple even a child could put them together.  I found a link to their original recipe right here.

Over the years I've made them a myriad of different ways.  As a simple Thanksgiving Day dinner accompaniment I stir in pecans and golden raisins; for a tea party I increase the zest and add in poppy seeds; for the children  I pour in chocolate chips; and to share with our Sunday School Class I've been known to turn them into maple oat scones.    This last alteration exploded my understanding of how much fun (and how simple) scones could be!  At this time in my family's dietary history I was avoiding bleached white flour, and began substituting whole wheat flour, then I began blending up oats and substituting them for half of the flour.  I didn't think they could get any better!  Sweet Marmalade, was I wrong!

This past year I've been taking baby steps to go completely wheat free in our home.  Along the way I've made muffins that are as dense as hockey pucks, and brownies that are as crumbly and tasteless as wet chalk.  But my scones have been a delight to transform!

Here's my new and improved wheat free OAT SCONE RECIPE:

3 cups blended oats (Bob's Red Mill Gluten Free Rolled Oats will allow you to go Gluten Free too)

1/2 cup raw honey

4 tsp. baking powder

1 tsp. salt

1 1/2 cups whipping cream

1 tsp. pure vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 375.  Mix together all ingredients until well mixed.  Shape into triangles of rounded cakes and place on parchment lined baking sheet.  Bake for approximately 15 minutes depending on scone size.

Here are two of my (current) favorite variations:

Coconut & Date Oat Scones - Stir in 1 cup of blended coconut, 1 cup of blended / sweetened  dried dates, and 1 cup of chopped pecans or walnuts.  Substitute almond extract instead of vanilla extract. (Wonderful with raspberry jam!)

Chocolate Oat Scones -  Add 4 TBS. Cocoa Powder and 1 cup of mini chocolate of carob chips.  Garnish with a drizzle of agave syrup and serve warm.  

Photographer Tammy Labuda flew all the way from TX to our lake house in Northern California to try my scones and blessed me with many fun pictures and this sweet review.  Let me know what you think!  Go ahead and tell me in a Haiku if you dare!

Today was not unlike any other day, complete with the high pitched whine of roll after roll of SCOTCH TAPE!  My middle-est son, Brody, outdid himself today.  "Mama, check out my wicked Wolverine costume."

As I took this photo this afternoon I remembered another post all about Scotch Tape... and one of our more challenging days.

(AUGUST 2011)

On the last day of the boys' Summer Vacation they pulled out their hefty box of craft supplies and "invented."  Caleb made a bow and arrow and Asher came up with a flower with eyes.  I had nothing to do with their creative brilliance.  I also had nothing to do with this...

How in the world did my five year old manage this remarkably authentic VIking costume, complete with piercings?  

Tape.  

The answer to all things Brody can usually be summed up with that single word.  Once I stopped hiding the tape, esteeming its market-value above it's Brody-value, things really got creative in our home.  Some days I'll wake up to find a naked bird-boy beside my bed... truly outfitted in nothing but colorful feathers (again from the craft box) and scotch tape.  Other days he turns our hallway into an art gallery with an entire coloring book's worth of art taped to the wall.  And let me not forget the day he spent crying because  his tape did not hold the power to turn him into a real robot... a costumed 'bot, maybe, but not a real one.

Today my creative oddball ventured forth from our tape-haven, out into the world of Kindergarten. I wasn't too concerned.  My greatest memories of Kindergarten include peeling dried white glue from my little hands, and sculpting and painting the keepsake Easter baskets and Christmas snowmen my mom still puts on display each holiday.  This creative child loved Kindergarten... why wouldn't he?

"So... how did it go?" you ask?  Well, let's just say that when I went to the opening day ceremonies at his school, where the entire class body welcomes the incoming Kindergarteners, Brody stood up before all his peers and mine, scowled right at me in the second row, and mouthed the words "take me home, NOW!"  When I smiled lovingly and shook my head no he signed the words, "I don't love you..."  

Marvelous!  

I have three strong boys.  #1 must always have his way,#2's way never seems to make sense, and #3 will soon be big enough to muscle the other two down to the floor until they surrender their strong wills and cry "mercy!"  

As I tucked #1 into bed this evening we reviewed his first week's Memory verse:

"Be joyful always, pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

I used to interpret the words, "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" to mean that God's will for us is that we give thanks in all our circumstances.  But recently I've come to believe that God's will for us is the circumstance that we are in, and therefore we are to give thanks for each one, no matter how challenging they may be.  

God crafted my boys together in my womb and gave them to me (in quick succession) as "gifts," as "rewards," as Proverbial "arrows" in my quiver, for His good pleasure and my ultimate good.  The circumstances I find myself in each day with these Blessed Hooligans are God's will for me in Christ Jesus!  He uses them to make me more like Himself; patient, kind, long-suffering, merciful, and good.   

And so I give Him thanks this evening.