...Weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.
There was an extended period in these early years of mothering young ones, where I tried desperately to keep my mouth shut in public. I couldn't muster positive truisms, only heart-felt confessions of how dark my heart felt. With confidants I shared the hardest of my hard days, and here on this blog I walked through many of the valleys, pointing to Jesus' promises as I trudged along in faith. Many of you sojourned beside me.
After five years of hard days, each one seemingly out-doing the one before, I was finally diagnosed with prolonged postpartum depression. Relief and sadness mingled at the diagnosis. While the prescribed remedies, purposed to bring my natural hormones back in balance, didn't bring instantaneous healing, I have come to realize in recent days that I am indeed on the other side. It once was Friday, but today is my Resurrection Celebration of Sunday.
These past couple of weeks as people have casually asked, "Hey, how are you?" Both surface level and sincere, this greeting was once a knife. But not recently! The realization that I feel truly happy has brought tears to my eyes with each greeting the past few weeks.
"Hey, How are you?"
"I'm good... I'm really good."
I have walked through the fire and am standing on the other side. And what I see before me is more beautiful than I could have imagined. This... this is what I see. These are the smiles, still smiling. These are the soft-hearted boys, still eager for tuck-ins. These are the ones I colored with and made smoothies with today. These are my sons, and their love has covered a multitude of my weary sins, though my goal was to let my love cover a multitude of theirs.
It's all such a miracle, this Love Covering. Jesus' love poured out is what we celebrate this Holy week! The darkness of Good Friday; the literal darkness of the sky that horrid day, and the figurative darkness of our soul's sin and sadness. Jesus' Love Covering, the blood cleansing, the absolute forgiveness of sins. Hope for death, depression and darkness. The Sunshine promise of Sunday, and even more than Sunday... forever! Once, for all! And I am here to attest that in your hard days, your darkest nights, your whacked out hormones and your own sin-nature... His love is covering, cleansing, restoring, refining, and transforming the hearts that turn to Him today.
And so I ask you, "Hey, How are you today?"
For He rescued us from the domain of darkness,
and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son,
in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.
"How are you today?"
I waited patiently for the Lord;
He turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the Lord
and put their trust in him.
"How are you?"
The night is nearly over;
the day is almost here.
"How are you?"
I'm a testimony of Sunday's power! And, Sunday is coming, Friends! Sunday is coming!